This one goes out to the ones I love. This one goes out to the ones I've left behind. A simple prop to occupy my time.

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Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Alias

Sloth has taken over my life. In an attempt to get ready for the fourth season of Alias which starts sometime in January, I am making an effort to review all the episodes (and seasons) I missed. It's always been a bit weird for me to watch tv on Sunday nights so I guess that may be why I have missed so many episodes of this show and come to think of it, Desperate Housewives, which also has a Sunday time slot. Although... when I was younger I remember diligently watching Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman on Sundays. Anyhow the point is that Sunday is a weird night to watch tv when nothing particularly great is on tv on most weekends.

If you want to know how far I have progressed... I have about six episodes left of Season 2 and then on New Years Day I am going to switch that set for Season 3. I also feel hideously lazy because I have spent many days on the couch rather than making an effort to go to the gym. The sad thing is that I think I re-gained all the weight I had lost in the last 6 months back within one month. It's awful!!! What makes it equally frustrating is that Jennifer Garner has an awesome body while I sit on the couch becoming soft. Can't I get fit by watching her fight bad guys and doing all that training?
Oh well... Vancouver Jen has a great scheme to run a marathon in May and since I discovered last year that my knees are not so great for running anymore, I will participate in gym training with her instead. Hopefully this semester will give me some more time to work out. I think I will need it too since I foresee lots more time spent at home studying for comps.

Time check: 1:23 am, which means I need to cut this short and get to bed. Good night!

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Monday, December 27, 2004

3rd Day of Christmas

Would it be the holidays if my sister and I didn't have a blowout during Christmas? Probably not. I am not sure how it started but Michaela probably just got on my nerves and then I let her have it on the drive home from Chapters. We both said awful things to each other, some of which are probably true. Although I have since tried to apologize, she is still very angry with me. We will see how long it takes for us to sit down face to face without screaming at each other. This could take days if she has the willpower.

Mel emailed me to tell me that she had received her German grade. I would like to have a decent holiday here at home so I have resolved not to check my grades until I am back in Vancouver in January. I keep praying that I did alright on the German exam because I don't think I can take another 12 weeks of it with that prof. I am also coming back too late to write the French translation test so I could be screwed here. I am not sure why I have had so much trouble trying to fulfill this modern language requirement but it has been a thorn in my side.

Anyhow, I am exhausted from the screaming match and feel that I need some quality time with some of my new gadgetry. Updates on familial discontent will follow.

~D.~

P.S. Remember a week and a half ago when Jen and I tried to contact the 'other side' through white noise? Well, we scared ourselves silly on the first try because we actually caught something on tape but every subsequent try didn't work. I wish we hadn't erased that first recording because none of the others that followed had anything remotely like it on them. Not to mention no one will believe us...


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A Noble Resolution

This man should be given an award merely for putting an end to the tripe that is Paris.

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Saturday, December 25, 2004

Merry Christmas

I hope everyone out there is having an enjoyable, peaceful, and relaxing day. Merry Christmas!

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Thursday, December 23, 2004

Pork to the World

Oh the joys of a snowstorm and a three hour drive to Waterloo on the 401. Sometimes I really miss super highways... but the 401 is not really so super (despite being 16 lanes wide) and was not especially so today. An hour and 15 minute drive to Waterloo took Rob and I about three bloody hours. The highlight: a Maple Leaf meats truck with the slogan 'Pork to the World' on the back. If my camera had been handy I would have rolled down the window to document this slogan for the blog. Alas, it was way in the back. Anyways, it gave us a good laugh.

The flight into Ontario was pretty good except that I didn't sleep very well - I usually don't on planes so it wasn't surprising. I had a decent cheese omelette breakfast and watched Elf which was even funnier this time. I finally caught up on some sleep last night. I went to bed at 11pm and woke up at 12:30pm! I think I could still go for some more sleep too. *rubs eyes*

I managed to pick up my brand spanking new computer (Andy promises it is loaded with goodies), have dinner at Dave's house, get to Wilf's to see some more friends and hear Blackwater Trio, and now it is time for bed. The renovations to the pub are awesome... although I think they could have done some better seat orientation so that more people can actually see the stage. I also feel they need to put up the old jerseys on the walls again. It looks quite sparse right now. I am glad that I didn't have to pay for the construction out of my student fees but God knows what UBC is really doing with mine. Martha Piper probably pockets a good percentage of it.

Tomorrow's goals: start and finish Christmas shopping - I don't know if it can be done on what
is supposed to be the busiest shopping day of the year. I dread to think what
might happen if I have to go out again on Christmas Eve.

Also, Rob and I may have quite the time trying to even get back to Toronto. 25cm of snow is on the way with some freezing rain mixed in. The 401 is going to be a massive Slip 'N Slide! Wish us luck that we get home safely.

Ok... must go sleep... very tired...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

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Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Auf Wiedersehen Deutscher

I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
The German exam is done, but I cannot promise it was great. My prof and I had a little chat on my way out... she recommended I go have a few drinks. Not so unusual since I had a theory that whenever she left in the middle of class that she was headed for the bathroom to chug some alcohol. I think her comments to me tonight indicate that I may have been correct.

Well... the deed is done. I have committed to spending my Reading Week in England. It's not that I hadn't thought I wouldn't go through with it, but it is much more realistic now that I have paid for a ticket. I am actually quite excited about it now. For some reason our flight goes through Glasgow but I am not concerned or even bothered. I would rather have a layover on the other side of the Atlantic than somewhere in the middle of Canada. Besides, 40 minutes in Scotland will give me enough time to have a drink and properly stretch and have a look around the airport lounge. Too bad my passport will say Scotland rather than England. The same thing happened when I went to Greece -- my stamp was for Amsterdam, but I spent considerably more time in Greece.

Anyways, I guess I have to finally do some packing. I should be leaving here for the airport in 4 hours. Jen has kindly offered to drive me to the airport so she is going to be getting up early with me as well. I am not sure she has really thought this through but I am taking the offer before she can revoke it. Soon enough I will be home battling crowds at the mall, running around buying new computers, and other errands that I never did 6 months ago when I was home. I can't wait to just crash in my own bed.

~D.~


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Sunday, December 19, 2004

Hope for Snow

24 hours makes all the difference. I was sinking into the depths of despair last night but that has passed. I am now finished my crap essay and 10 crappy article reviews. I am still slightly alarmed about tomorrow's German exam but the end is in fact, in sight.

The news from home is that it is snowing. I hope to God it stays that way because I am sick and tired of rain. As pretty as Vancouver can be and as nice as the mountains look... give me a good pile of snow in the middle of December any day and I will be quite happy.

Jen and I trekked out to UBC today to dump my library books - it was very satisfying to shove them down the return chute. Then we headed over to Staples where I invested in a USB flash drive. I figure this may just help me save cd's when I have to take in Powerpoint presentations to school, since I still do not own a laptop. It's also going to come in handy for transporting all my files from Mel's laptop onto my new computer when I get home. I anticipate many good things for little Zippy and I. I also caved and bought a Swingline stapler that staples up to 60 pages. I am so sick of tracking down a good stapler at school that I thought I finally better invest in one of my own.
Anyways, this is all that is new. It's nothing exciting but I feel like a million tonnes have been lifted from my shoulders. I could dance for joy if I didn't have to learn to read German in the next 24 hours. Now it's really friggin' cold in here right -- my feet are entirely numb -- and our heat is already cranked. I swear that stupid furnace doesn't really work. Thank god we don't pay for utilities directly [that I know of].

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Saturday, December 18, 2004

Pathos

The hours drag by... no work is getting done. I want to get out of this city. I need to sleep in my own bed and see different friends. I feel trapped in this cave of our apartment. I want this stupid essay, those stupid reviews and that god awful German exam to be over with. If only you could fast forward the most excruciating parts of your life, I would be so much happier at this moment.

I tried looking for flights to England today. Everything seems to be getting more expensive but I have faith that I can find something that is cheap. I am excited to have a trip to look forward to and I will be glad to see Susan, Erik, Greg and a bunch of other people who now reside there. I need a break because I feel burnt out. I feel like I am becoming a cog in a wheel... losing all my emotions. I kind of feel like a cold shell of myself right now. Where have I lost myself? Will I ever get back to me? Oh God, please help me feel something again.

listening to: talking heads - once in a lifetime

p.s. Jenny is the most stubborn person I know! She definitely gets pissed off when people treat her like shit (I am not to blame either!).

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Friday, December 17, 2004

Channelling the Dead

This is the ultimate in procrastination. Jen and I are going to try and channel the dead through white noise. What the fuck? you might ask... well we saw an ad on tv for the new movie 'White Noise' which features stories about people who have supposedly channelled their loved ones on radio or television frequencies. We went to the website www.aaevp.com to just read up on stuff about this and found a do-it-yourself EVP guide, so we are going to give it a go. I suspect that we are going to scare the shit out of ourselves but it could be fun.
I'll let you know the results of our experiment later.

~D.~

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Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Anybody Wanna Take Me Home?

Essay #2 is handed in... Essay #3 should probably be half written by now but ha ha ha, (sobering thought ahead) it is not. Call me superfucked, cuz that is what I am. Instead of writing interesting facts about Roman colonization in the mid-Republic, I spent the afternoon with Jen driving around in her sporty new Mazda 323 hatchback. The car has spirit that is for sure... we are brainstorming names for the little thing. Its colour is grey so we thought about Dorian... but a friend of mine has a grey tabby cat named that. The name Fabian came up and a discussion about the car's potential sexuality. See how tired I am? I discussed a metal object's sexuality as determined by its shape. Angular curves... an oxymoron.
This week is getting to be filled with pressure and I have succumbed by drinking a coke. It's my secret little addiction which I have cut back on significantly in the past year. I rarely drink pop anymore... mainly juice, water and iced tea... but still the occasional coke makes me very happy. I also think my coke addiction killed any effect that caffeine might have on me because I could drink litres of it and still have a good three hour nap whereas most people I know cannot drink anything with caffeine past three in the afternoon or they will be up til the witching hour. Speaking of the witching hour... it was my favourite Anne Rice book for years... and I believe I read a definition of the witching hour once and it is not midnight as most people would think but it occurs around 3am which I found a bit odd. I am not sure what all of this means. Words are jumbled in my head. Vocabulary is repetitive. I cannot write another 25 page essay. HELP!

P.S. We should all watch the History Channel on January 2nd, 2005 and watch the special on Hannibal which Greg was interviewed for last summer. How cool is that... I will have my VCR prepped to record... ah poor little VCR is also going the way of dodo bird.. I think it has also kidnapped my brain. *sigh*

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Tuesday, December 14, 2004

How do you solve a problem like Maria?

Ergh... progress... is... slow... and ... painful.

word count: 3229
hours of sleep: 6 in the last 48 hours

I just want to watch movies all day long. Speaking of which... why is 'The Sound of Music' always aired around the Christmas holidays? I don't find it to be a particularly cheery theme given that a family is fleeing Austria to save themselves from the Nazis. Is there some subconscious association with the Holy Family having to fleeing Judaea? I think that is about the closest connection I can come up with. Any thoughts about why 'The Sound of Music' is aired around this time every year are appreciated.

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R.I.P. Computer

Dear Computer,

I loved you for five years; my longest relationship. We went through many changes with each other. I (hopefully) learned to be a better student with you, and you received many hardware upgrades. Eventually I think our relationship hit a snag when I began to demand more of you. Your capabilities of pleasing me had waned and I was becoming increasingly bitter with your poor performance. I only recently invested in some new RAM for you because I thought it would help you maintain a satisfactory (but hopefully increased) level of proficiency. However, in the end I think my needs wore you out and you've gone and broken our bond. How will I live without you? At least I was able to get my files back from you before you destroyed them forever out of spite. R.I.P. computer, you will never find another user like me.


In other news, Andy is building me a new computer which I will come into possession of when I get home for Christmas. I am very excited about it... wish I had it now. In the meantime, Mel has kindly let me borrow her laptop for the week so I can finish writing my essays. Blech... what a dirty word 'essay' is. At least exams are about 24-72 hours of agonizing (aka studying) and then 3 hours of writing, whereas I could write essays for weeks and still feel like they are total shite. I cannot wait for final essays to be completed and handed in.

To procrastinate tonight, Jen and I walked down to London Drugs where I bought my millionth Terry's Mint Chocolate Orange of the season. In the toothpaste aisle there was a clusterfuck of people. No idea why everyone in the store had congregated in aisle 4 but it was suffocatingly awful. I had a fleeting moment of Tourette's where I wanted to scream out a string of profanities to send the moms, kids, and grannies running for their lives. However, I managed to suppress it nicely by making a quick exit to the shampoo aisle.
Note: London Drugs AND Shopper's Drug Mart no longer carry my favourite shampoo which is very irritating in itself.
In that aisle, some weirdo employee sidled up to where I was standing and just had to start arranging all the bottles on the shelf in front of me. It was quite evident that he must have thought I looked suspicious as he wasn't doing any real work at all. It was a weird night and my calendar says it's not even a full moon, just a Monday.
Ah, London Drugs, always dependable for a good time and creepy teenage employees trying to brown-nose their way to the top by ratting out shoplifters.

Current Essay Word Count: 1738
Final Goal: 5000-ish
Days spent Procrastinating: All Semester

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Sunday, December 12, 2004

Should I buy this t-shirt?

I really want this shirt, but where would I wear it? More shirts should have the word 'fuck' in them.



tomato Posted by Hello

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Saturday, December 11, 2004

Christmas Spirit

I feel like I am becoming jaded. I have no Christmas spirit so far this year. It feels like my mind is fighting it because I still have so much work to complete for this term before I go home. I also feel like there is a lot of negativity in terms of religious holidays and it bothers me. Why do people who aren't particularly loyal to any sort of faith sucked into the commercialism that has become Christmas? The older I get, the more I honestly hate having to buy gifts, but Christmas always feels magical. I think I am becoming more attached to Christmas as a celebration of my religious faith but at the same time I feel so at odds with the church. I honestly haven't attended church much since I started university. As bad as this makes me feel, I still feel deeply connected to it and would call myself a practicing Catholic. Now obviously I don't follow all Church doctrines and I know there are some major problems with its compatibility to the modern world, but I like that it's a mainstay when everything around me changes so quickly. I am not quite sure why I feel attached and I am terrible at expressing it. Sometimes I wonder if it's been ingrained in me since I was a child. More often than not I just feel that spiritually, being a Catholic is right for me. Just like I know I should be an archaeologist, I know I should be a Catholic. Perhaps this is dwelling on it a bit too much, but I just feel bitter that so many self-proclaimed agnostics and atheists who are quick to shun Christianity in general, end up participating in some sort of seasonal gift-giving. Perhaps I am dead wrong on this issue. I really try not to get involved in Church politics. It's a sticky issue to be caught in and not something that is particularly enjoyable. Now I've just re-read what I have written and I am digging myself into a hole. This issue stops here.

In other news, my computer is officially hitting rock bottom and I had to call Andy to help me out of the mess. He is sending me some new Win XP discs so I can reformat the poor thing. He said he was surprised the poor computer was still running after all this time, which just goes to show you how fast technology moves and how badly machines are put together nowadays. This computer has experienced my entire university career with me. I am beside myself with fear that it will die. As it is I have spent most of today burning all my important documents and mp3's so that I won't be screwed if it dies and so I can wipe it clean in the reformatting. I guess in the long run it will just be a quick fix and I will have to invest in a new computer. I wonder if I will be able to make it through next semester with it. Something tells me... maybe not. Cross your fingers for the computer and my essay. Both need to be put to rest.

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Friday, December 10, 2004

Hadrian goes to Athens

Well... I have handed in one essay and written one exam. Only four more things on my list to go...
Today's exam included an essay question that wanted us to give a tour of Athens to the Emperor Hadrian and then explain how we would entice him to build new things in the city. I LOATHE questions like that and the worst part was that it was the one question where we didn't have a choice over whether to write it or not. I was prepared for this essay topic but the logistics of how to write the answer while pretending you are an ancient tour guide for an Emperor is always a little hard to figure out on the spot.

Anyhow, Cassie sent out this bizarre link around to us CNERS kids with the warning that it was addictive to watch. I am not so sure but if you love eggs than perhaps this is the weird little song & animated dance clip for you. I am not so sure it is addictive but I have watched it a few times and laughed, and Karen says she has kind of watched it repeatedly. You make the call.

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Sunday, December 05, 2004

Not a Gloomy Sunday


Mountain View Posted by Hello


Log Yards off Pacific Spirit Park Posted by Hello


I went out with Angie for lunch and then we went for a short drive out to UBC. We got some interesting photos along the way as it is nice and sunny today.

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Saturday, December 04, 2004

White Houses

This song by Vanessa Carlton reminds me of living at 62 Marshall St. ... sometimes I still dream about that place. It certainly wasn't the greatest house ever in terms of architecture but it WAS the greatest house ever to live in with the people I lived with. A lot of phrases in this song bring back memories of stuff we all did together and experiences we all went through. I guess sometimes I really just miss Laurier and that lifestyle we had.

White Houses
Crashed on the floor when I moved in
this little bungalow with some strange new friends
Stay up too late and I'm too thin
We promise each other it's til the end
now we're spinning empty bottles it's the five of us
with Pretty-eyed boys girls die to trust
I can't resist the day, no I can't resist the day

Jenny screams out and it's no pose
when she dances she goes and goes
beer through the nose on an inside joke
I'm so excited I haven't spoken
And she's so pretty and she's so sure
maybe I'm more clever than a girl like her
Summer's all in bloom, summer's ending soon

It's alright, and it's nice not to be so alone
But I hold onto secrets, In white houses

maybe I'm a little bit over my head
I come undone at the things he said
he's so funny in his bright red shirt
we were all in love and we all got hurt
I sneak into his car's cracked leather seat
The smell of gasoline in the summer heat
Boy we're going way too fast, it's all too sweet to last

It's alright and I put myself in his hands
But I hold onto secrets, in white houses
Love or something ignites in my veins
and I pray it never fades, In white houses

My first time, hard to explain rush of blood,
and a little bit of pain, on a cloudy day,
It's more common than you'd think, he's my first mistake

Maybe you were all faster than me
We gave each other up so easily
Silly little wounds will never mend
I feel so far from where I've been

So I go and I will not be back here again
I'm gone as the day is fading, On white houses
I lied, wrote my injuries all in the dust
In my heart, it's the five of us, In white houses
And you, Maybe you'll remember me
What I gave it is your's to keep, In white houses.

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You don't win friends with Salad

Procrastination SUCKS!!!!! I am sitting here attempting to finish this godforsaken essay on the Copper trade from Cyprus and I cannot. I have a great outline and know what has to be written but I cannot sit still for more than 5 seconds. AHHHHHHHHH. Jen and I are going to see National Treasure later tonight which probably isn't a good idea but I figure I will just pull an all nighter to finish this crappy paper after the movie. At least it's a weekend and I can stay up all night if I want. I always feel like shit when I pull an all-nighter during the week knowing that I will be suffering for it through every single class until the weekend. But... if the all-nighter is on a weekend than you can just sacrifice the next day, right? Anyhow... random thoughts galore.

Yesterday Smallville took over UBC by Koerner Library and the Math building and made it Metropolis University. Where is my camera when I need it? I stood around with a million other students who were stopping to gawk and we watched some scene be repeatedly shot from different angles and different light settings. The actors were the girls who play the characters of Chloe (Allison Mack) and Lois Lane (Erica Durance). It was actually kind of cool to see this being made since I have watched Smallville with the Marshall girls since it began. It kind of became a Tuesday night ritual at Marshall St. for all of us to sit and watch it together. No easy feat when 7 people have 7 different schedules. Anyways, I always think of the girls and guys when I think of Smallville. *sigh*

Another thing on my mind lately is the AIA 2005 conference. I looked at the itinerary and I desperately want to go. As it is the other students in our department are sponsoring Karen to attend since there is a session on the site of Morgantina which is central to her thesis. She went to Sicily this summer and visited the site but it was empty... not a soul around. At least at this meeting there will be some of the scholars who work there that she can talk with.
Anyhow... there are tons of different sessions on many different and awesome talks and damnit I wish I had a job to pay to go. I could drive down from Kingston with Jen and Karen on the 6th of January but then I have to pay the fees for the conference ($55 US) and change my flight back to Vancouver on the 9th of Jan to the 10th of Jan which will be at least $25. I also would have to fly out of Boston to Toronto to catch that flight to Vancouver on the 10th ($59 + tax on Air Canada). And then there is the gas money to drive down, the hotel, spending money b/c it's Boston and of course I would go to Salem to see the Museum there. Yikes... it sounds like an awesome 5 days with 3000 archaeology geeks but it gets pricey really quickly. I don't know if I will be kicking myself in the butt later because I didn't go. It's probably best for me to just come directly back to Vancouver on the 9th. I think I would rather shell out the money to visit Susan in London during Reading Week. Man... why does this year have to be a year when I want to do lots of travelling and have limited amounts of money? Sometimes I really just HATE MONEY. Guess I'll go buy a lottery ticket now.

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Wednesday, December 01, 2004

The Road Not Taken

The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveller, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could,
To where it bent in the undergrowth.

Then took the other, just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear.
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same.

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I --
I took the one less travelled by,
And that has made all the difference.

~Robert Frost~

8 years ago, I sat in a hospital in a room of sorrowful hell. I never would have guessed where I would be sitting now. I know you are out there watching out for me. I love you and miss you.
Denise.

 
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