Sang-Froid

Why is life so hard to deal with sometimes?

Robbie Burns Day

In an ode to Scotland's favourite poet, today my office had an organized celebration of Burns' birthday and of Scottish culture in general. Now I've known about this shindig for a few weeks now but had no idea what to expect. Somewhere back about 5 generations or so I know there is some Scottish blood in my family line but we're definitely more Irish than anything else. So even though I tried to feel like I could relate, I really couldn't.
Anyways, at the office it's not entirely surprising that this is a highlight of the year for the company because upon reading the surnames of the staff list, it appears that about 70% of the employees here are of Scottish descent. Apparently each year this celebration becomes a little more organized and probably a little more insane. People came into work wearing plaid which is fair given the amount of people who wear green on St. Patrick's or red on Valentine's. We stopped working an hour early and congregated in the boardroom and watched a bagpiper march in, leading a procession in which the guest of honour was a haggis on a plate. Someone recited Burns' 'Ode to a Haggis' in a bad Scottish accent and then we were told to dig into the food spread.
Oh and there was a lot of expensive Scotch which a lot of people were liberally partaking in. I stayed for a while, gingerly tried the haggis which is quite tasty once you get over the fact that before it is cut open it looks like the most hideous thing in the world. It's about 50% oatmeal so it's not all weird meats mixed together and it has a pate kind of texture. I would say that if you can eat sausages than you can definitely eat haggis. I am not sure how much I could have eaten since I only had two spoonfuls but everything in moderation is always a good rule right?
Anyhow I ate a few other treats on the table, mainly short bread cookies and an awesome scone. Then I booked it at 5pm because as much as I hate to say this, I wasn't going to stick around for a party held AT work. If the party had taken place at a different venue, I would have stayed because it would have been AWAY from work. But it wasn't. And I had a life outside of work to get on with. It was however a very interesting experience more for observing the personalities of the older associates than anything else.

5th century BCE Athenian Plague identified!

For your daily intake of news about the ancient world, the source of the 5th century BC plague that decimated Athens during the Peloponnesian War has been attributed to Typhoid Fever!
Read the story here.

Vote or Die

In the last US election, celebrities jumped into advertising campaigns urging citizens, especially youth, to go out and vote. One of those celebrities was P. Diddy (or Diddy or whatever name he adheres to these days), and his campaign was called 'Vote or Die'. To me that just sounds like some silly gangster rap attempt at giving the right to vote some street cred, but if you think about it, voting is extremely important. Voting is a right that people have fought for and still fight for in various parts of the world. I am not sure why voters are particularly apathetic in today's society, but, I can understand the feelings of futility that arise when contemplating current Canadian politics.
Today with the national election upon us, I hope that more people are going out to make informed choices at the polls, however, I know that likely won't happen. My sister tells me appalling stories of her male housemates who don't even care who they elect, they are voting for the candidates whom their parents vote for. It's a sobering thought that in this day and age some university students have that attitude... that they are so apathetic to their country that someone else needs to make their decisions for them. I mean, they seem to be able to live apart from their parents all by themselves and go to school all by themselves, so why can't they think and vote for themselves? Some might say we should be congratulating them on even getting out the door to go and vote, but I don't subscribe to that. If you are going to vote, why would you waste your ballot and give someone else the power to make your decisions? That's why there is a legal age for voting. You aren't considered responsible enough to make such important decisions until that age.
Apart from the fact that someone else fought for you to have an individual say in the political formation processes of Canada, maybe we should contemplate the fact that if we don't vote we don't have a single right to make any nasty comments about Canadian politics until the next election, when hopefully more voting will take place.
So, as eligible Canadian voters head to the polls today, we should all contemplate our choices and the potential consequences. Are you spoiling ballots or voting for parties who won't change the impending doom and gloom?
Well, for me, it's as my friend Cassie so succinctly put it in her messenger name last week, 'Friends don't let Friends vote Conservative'.

P.S. This guy seems to be gaining some notoriety as a good predictor of Canadian election outcomes, although as far as I know he has only successfully predicted the results of our last election. Let's hope that today his projections are skewed.

Chocolate Milk

Chocolate milk is so comforting in times of need.














Who knew it came in 4L bags?...

Soundtrack of My Life

I think I've blogged about this before but when I fall in love with a song that I can relate to (with emotions of the past or present), I always think that I would add it to the soundtrack of my life. In my mind, the soundtrack of a life is the music that would underscore extremely meaningful, life defining events in much the same way that music is used as an added emotional prop in movies.
So, for the latest additions to the soundtrack of my life, I notice that I have become more obsessed with light dreamy electronica and the ethereal vocals that sometimes play over that music. I date this interest to starting in highschool because I would listen to Enya to fall asleep at night, but categorically, I think her music is more "new age".

By the way, I hate explaining what music sounds like because I never know what an appropriate category might be. There are so many classifications that seem to bleed into one another that I am more often than not, confused by how music is categorized in music stores, on iTunes, and even in other peoples minds. Point being, I will probably never be able to catalogue or describe music very well, so don't ask me to.*

I think a major turning point for my little love affair with this music was watching the movie 'The Beach', which featured a lot of trip-hop and electronica based music. In particular, Moby's "Porcelain" always sticks out in my mind. The dreamy quality of the synthetic sounds always evokes (for myself) that air of daydreaming and fantasy that I romanticize into my own perceptions of the world. Some might say this is living life through rose coloured glasses, but I like to think that it is the side of my personality that steps away from cynicism and embraces hope and fantasy.

My motivation for writing this post comes from having mentioned a lot of dreamy artists, like Imogen Heap and even a few others who don't necessarily always compose in this style, but I've found the few songs that are. For instance, the last Dido album 'Life For Rent' has an awesome song called 'Stoned' that I am in love with. It is a better album in my opinion than 'No Angel' and as long as she keeps pursuing these tangents I'll keep buying her cds. Another artist I've stumbled upon is Ivy.
Actually, Michaela went on a quest to find out a song by Ivy that played in a Veronica Mars episode, and then she told me the name. I've heard the song before and Ivy has been around for a number of years, but I was just a little slow on the discovery. Probably had my head buried in a book or was busy listening to more rockier music.
Anyways, this trio is awesome, I love the music they are making, and I love that mournful daydream quality that stirs my emotions. Perhaps you are beginning to notice that so far, January has been a very contemplative month for me.

*Also as a side note for discovering new music based on categories, in the past little while when I worked in the lab, we used a site called Pandora, the home base of the Music Genome Project, which attempts to match music to a category or band you input into their search engine. I would say that 70% of the time it has matched up some good listening based on the searches we input but sometimes it is dead wrong. However, they are so clever, that if something doesn't match your idea of what should music be coming up , you can tell them not to put it onto your playlist preferences again.

Boxset Blues

You know what sucks? Buying a 40-disc boxset of the complete series of one of your favourite tv shows and having ONE disc fuck up so that you have to exchange the ENTIRE collection. So, after having watched more than half of these discs with no problems, I have to go and get a new set. And it could take me a long time to figure out if any of the new discs ever have a problem, because who knows when I'm going to go back and watch the ENTIRE fucking series. So here's a big "Fuck you" to 20th Century Fox. Thanks.

Ex adyto cordis

I'm alive, I swear. Work drains my energy, but I'm slowly clawing my way through the rest of this week. It's taking so long to end.
I'm learning that trying to keep up correspondence is insane, as if I didn't already know this. It's hard to keep in touch with people. I am so brutal at it, I would rather just see people face to face but that isn't always feasible. For clarification, any friends are always welcome to come visit me whenever you want and when I have the funds I promise to visit more of you.
I've started looking at round trip tickets to Vancouver. I think a springtime visit is appropriate and possibly also my last chance to visit and see people for perhaps a few years. We'll see what happens, but if it's in my head now, likely it will happen in late April or May. Just thought I'd jot down these thoughts so I can contemplate them a little more. Once I put them down on paper or say them out loud, plans start to formulate, so I hope I'll be taking a trip in a few months.

Goodnight and Go

You know what is fucking ridiculous? The weather in my fair province. I had a lovely day on Friday because I got to get out of the office and do some test pitting in Aurora. It was lovely because it was 10C degrees outside. Today, it is -15C. Winter, please kindly decide on a temperature range that is not going to fuck with nature and my mind.

In other news, the house is kind of dull now. It's just Dad and me and the 3 little terrors of course. Mary-Anne is in Calgary with her sisters and Michaela is back at school. This house is of an average size but it feels so empty with only two people in it. I think even the cats are kind of depressed.

On a brighter note, Michaela and I saw Imogen Heap on Thursday at the El Mocambo. Imogen may be better known to some people as the vocalist in the electronic duo Frou Frou. They had that cool song 'Let Go' at the end of Garden State.
Anyways, Imogen's show was so phenomenal because it was so intimate -- I think the maximum capacity of the club is about 300 people and it may not have even been at that number. It really did feel like we had been invited to her living room to watch her play around with her musical machinery and sing to us. It was such a well spent $20. If you have a chance to kick back and check her out, you should. Her voice is just as haunting live as it is on her records, and even then I thought they had been mostly electronically simulated. Well, to be fair I guess there is some manipulation of vocals with a computer, but the girl does it all herself right there in front of you so it's not like you feel like you are watching Britney Spears play her cd on the sound system for you. She actually introduces 'her band' for you so you can see what she is doing up there twisting all the knobs and whatnot. It was like watching the next generation of musical creation unfolding in front of our eyes. No more musicians, just get out the Macintosh and play away. Definitely a different experience than most concerts.

Steady As We Go

It's been a bit of a bummer of a weekend. I just haven't been feeling very well all around. I'd like to blame it on January blues and this cold I've been trying to evade but it's not just these events. I'm only consoled by the fact that I may be known as Miss Mope for a while. I will get over it all so just bear with me for a while.
However, to top things off, another family crisis has arisen as one of my step-aunt's was just diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. It's just the latest in a string of events that has been a bit trying for my family. The details are still sketchy at the moment but it's not looking good. Speculation is all we have and that's not exactly easing our minds. I'll just have to hope and pray for the best.

Who knows what the rest of this young year will bring, but it's got to start looking up at some point right?
I thought 2005 was a pretty good year, and I still have hope that 2006 can be a good one too.

Say Hello, Wave Goodbye

Today will mark the close of an approximately two week period on a collision course that took me completely by surprise over the holidays. It makes me teary-eyed now because goodbyes are always hard for me. I hate watching people leave for better pastures and feeling so stagnant myself. Which by the way, is not even true about myself, but sometimes I am pretty good at convincing myself that I am not progressing forward.

Ok, so, maybe what I really hate is watching opportunities walk away. Kissing goodbye chances that could make or break the total happiness factor I'm always aiming for.
Am I talking in enough riddles for you yet?
I've probably overthought this entire thing now because I feel so glum. When it comes down to it, I know nothing of what's to come or what is for the best or worst.
In the past little while I've enjoyed myself a lot, had some good laughs and talks, and discovered some unexpected things about myself and even about other people around me.
Mostly I've realized that I seem to always forget or neglect balancing all aspects of my life. I feel so driven to succeed in my career and will do almost anything it takes to get where I want to go, but in turn, what am I sacrificing along the way?
I'm always leaving for somewhere, always saying hellos and goodbyes. I like the choices I've made so far and I have no regrets now. But ultimately, is this drive going to bite me in the ass one day?


P.S. This blog is two years old today.

Office Space

This is one of those days when I kind of mourn the fact that this blog is not as personally detailed as I originally intended it. Though, it's probably a good idea that I edit myself by imagining all sorts of horrible fall out if it was discovered by the wrong people.
For instance, when I want to bitch about my job but know I shouldn't. But don't you find that you always complain about the things you love anyways? Must be human nature.
Today was only my first day but it helped me realize that the next four months or so will be loooooooooong. I am looking forward to school in September and I really appreciate that I am going to be digging again in the summer and then back to researching. I think that is really what I am happiest doing.

I forgot to mention this before in my cryptic New Year's Day entry, but Michaela and I spent our New Year's Eve day taking in the Catherine the Great exhibit at the AGO. It was an awesome exhibit and really got me longing to be back in Classics. So much of her lifestyle was spent propagating her legitimacy to the Romanov throne, which she had seized after doing away with her husband. It's no wonder that her obsession with Classical antiquity was referenced throughout her art collections, public works, and personal propaganda. When in doubt about how to promote yourself and your imperialistic goals, look back to Greece and Rome.
It was well worth seeing and I'm only sorry that I didn't see it sooner. Since it is moving onto Montreal tomorrow, I would recommend to friends going to the AIA conference in Montreal, that they try and see it if they can tear themselves away from the lectures.

2006

You think you know... What you are, what's to come.
You haven't even begun.